Other-Centered Love Makes Money (Achievement Nudge about Shifting Perspective)

Did you know that โ€œloveโ€ can make you money? Noโ€ฆnot in THAT way; thatโ€™s โ€œlust!โ€ Let me explain.

Achieve Reward by Shifting Perspective

I often have a โ€œYouโ€™re kidding me!โ€ response to research that states the obvious. Iโ€™m such a believer that โ€œcommon senseโ€ should beโ€ฆwell, COMMON, that I am amazed when a research project spends tons of resources to report on what we should already know. Hereโ€™s an example.

Harvard Business Review, the tried, true and trusted source of โ€œbusiness-knowledge-gold,โ€ reported on a common sense โ€œduhโ€ in an article about business startups. Sramana Mitra spoke of two things that โ€œโ€ฆdetermined whether a business can get off the ground successfully and sustainably…โ€ First, you must find a market opportunity of something that customers want and are willing to pay for. Second, you must have a product or service that addresses the opportunity.

At first, I had my disgusted โ€œduhโ€ response. But something nagged at me, suggesting there was a deeper truth here. Thenโ€ฆI got it! I realized that this common-sense fact ISNโ€™T common. Iโ€™ve talked to many people who have an idea for a business that is more focused on what they want to deliver, rather than delivering what a potential customer would want to buy.

And THAT thought led me to THIS one: We all do thisโ€ฆbut not just in business. In all aspects of life, I saw how we often focus on what WE want to give rather than what OTHERS want to receive. I saw that the REAL teaching of this โ€œafore-labeled-duhโ€ is this: If we have a perspective shift, and focus on what our โ€œcustomerโ€ wants, we can be more successful and gain greater reward. 

If the out of work person focused on what an employer needs and fills that, he will be more successful than just trying to โ€œget a job.โ€ Asking, โ€œWhat does this other person need in our conversation?โ€ rather than on what I want to say in the conversation, can make communication more successful. Being attentive to another driverโ€™s needs rather than just ours can make freeways safer.

As I continued to dig down this mineshaft of โ€œduh-fullโ€ insights, I found TRUE gold. I realized that reward (in business, life and relationships) comes from exercising the principle of true love. Not romantic love. Iโ€™m talking about the most fundamental, bedrock, โ€œsource-loveโ€ there is โ€“ โ€œother-centeredness.โ€

True love is centered on the needs and wants of the other person. It is not focused on what I want to give, it is focused on what the receiver wants to receive. My grandson wants to play. My wife appreciates flowers. My friend needs support. My employee likes a compliment. Other-centered love doesnโ€™t focus on MY giving. Instead, I focus on what others want to receive, and fulfill THAT.

Now, the Harvard Business Reviewโ€™s โ€œduh-reportโ€ makes meaningful sense. โ€œFind what the customer, wants and fulfill itโ€ is a basic principle of life. If you shift your perspective to the needs and wants of your employee, employer, spouse, child, friend, or neighbor, and fulfill those…guess what? The โ€œcustomerโ€ will want to buy from you again.


This article is part of our ongoingย Achievement Nudgeย seriesโ€”short, witty, and often inspirational articles to spark your personal and professional growth. Exploreย more nudges on our blog, orย sign up for our weeklyย Nudge and Newsย email. Each edition includes an Achievement Nudge plus leadership, professional development, and personal growth videos and articles to keep you inspired and on track.

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