Phantom Pain (Achievement Nudge)

---

Last Updated on June 2, 2025 by Bill Truby

I hope you’re not experiencing phantom pain. But if you are, here’s what you can do about it.

My mother-in-law lost the lower part of her right leg because of constricted circulation that came from huge surgery complications. Now she gets along nicely with a prosthetic leg, but sometimes experiences a strange effect called “phantom pain.”

Phantom pain is common in amputees. It’s when you feel pain, real pain, in a limb that is no longer there. Mom felt it in her “foot” that wasn’t there anymore. She told me that the pain was the same pain she felt when she still had her foot, and in the same location as if her foot were still there. She said it hurt just as ba,d too.

Phantom pain is weird. It’s weird because it feels absolutely real, but it’s coming from remembered pain. It’s not real. That’s weird, right? Yet the weirdness of phantom pain is surpassed by the weirdness of its cure, a cure called “mirror therapy.”

Mirror therapy is simply holding a mirror in front of where the limb used to be, looking at it, and acknowledging that the limb is gone. I applied this therapy to the pain in mom’s absent foot and got amazing results. The pain went away instantly and didn’t come back. She thought it was magic. (Maybe it was “phantom magic”).

For me, the weirdest part of this weird pain, and weirder cure, was using the mirror. Why couldn’t Mom just look at the missing foot and get the same results? Why did she need a mirror? Then I realized this: The power wasn’t in the mirror. The mirror was used to manage the mind. Here’s how it worked.

A mirror is a dispassionate, objective reflector of reality. If mom looked at the place where her foot used to be, a part of her mind believed it was still there. Since we have learned to trust that the reflections in a mirror are real, holding the mirror in front of her missing foot allowed another part of her mind to say, “Your foot is NOT there.” And if the foot isn’t there, there can’t be any pain. POOF. No pain.

How about the pain you feel in life, not your limbs, but your life? If you’re like most people, the perspectives and pain in your life come from your past. And, like most people, most of it is an illusion, a set of feelings that result from the memory of things that are no longer there. If this is true for you, you need a mirror. You need mirror therapy.

An objective friend, a counselor, maybe a collection of friends; each or all can be your mirror. Ask them to objectively reflect what they see. Ask them, “Do you think there’s really something to this? Is my ‘foot’ really there?” And if your “mirror” says there’s really nothing there, and you trust the mirror’s reflection, acknowledging its truth, your pain can go away – instantly. You see, when perspectives and beliefs change, the reality of what you experience and feel changes right along with it.

Now be careful if you try this therapy. Treat the mirror gently no matter what it reflects. Mirrors are fragile, and “people-mirrors” are even more fragile than glass ones. Plus, you break a glass mirror, I hear you get seven years of bad luck. Break a people-mirror, and you just might have a lifetime of bad consequences.

---

This article is part of our ongoing Achievement Nudge series—short, witty, and often inspirational articles to spark your personal and professional growth. Explore more nudges on our blog, or sign up for our weekly Nudge and News email. Each edition includes an Achievement Nudge plus leadership, professional development, and personal growth videos and articles to keep you inspired and on track.

---